chop suey

i feel a mix of emotions right now.

sabaw warning. as in sabog pati grammar.. lahat lahat na. verbal diarrhea lang po ito. 

first. i think i still have immersion after shock. 

i can still remember my bed (na hindi na rin bed kasi papag nga lang na kasyang kasya lang talaga ako, one move at mahuhulog na ako). 

my stomach's also craving for leaves (technically kasi, yung pinakain sakin dun puro gulay) 

my lungs also want a fill of fresh air.

my skin is asking for more scorching straight-from-the-heat-of-the-sun (umiiiiiitiiiim pow meh)

more importantly, i remember my family's faces and our conversations and our talks over our meals. their ordeals and experiences and their generosity. 

i am also greatly touched by the smiles of all the children. the way they just hold your hand even if they don't know your name. walking around with us and never letting go of our hands trusting we wont let it go.. i will surely miss the kids. as well as their tears. they cried when we left .. aries did. (si iggy na sobra kaming kinulit at ginawan ng isyu ni iggi ay di na nagpakita nung paalis na kami.. theory namin ni iggi, nagkulong sa kanila at umiyak. pero ma.mimiss ko yung ngiti niya)

second. stress and fears over enlistment. since MCTan issued a "directive" about the sectioning and blocking thing, i felt i totally lost control over my life.. i ended up getting the profs i didnt want the schedules i tried to avoid but in the end i got a sched i didnt really want but was the most convenient for me. the problem now is i absolutely have no idea who my groupmates will be. God save my soul.

third. pissed with GLOBE telecom. they had some system defect yesterday and i tried to reload it over and over again but it always did not register. and today, i cannot text my fellow globers only people from other networks. but still i wont be able to text them since i don't have load. 

life.