as of the moment..

i have been viewing the friendster profiles of my old high school friends.. (i knew i won't find many of them having mulitply accounts).. so a lot of emotions went rushing thru me.

• longing- longing because it made me feel even more the effects of the distance between me and my old (and true) friends.. i miss cdoo terribly but then again kung naa ko didto ma.miss pud nako ang manila so magkagubot napud ko sa akong mga gipangbati..  now, i feel the weight of not being there on my friends' birthdays or gimiks or what-have-yous.. kasi di ba? these were the very pipol i spent 4 birthdays, 4 xmas parties, 4 years, 4 SCHOOL years of high school with.. i practically sent most of my precious time with them.. that includes the late nights, the copying of assignments, the group projects, the saturday laags.. EVERYTHING.. well not everything, (most na lang)..  and its so amazing how they have changed thru all these months.. naay uban na ning bitch ug samut.. naay uban na ning bitch lang ug kalit.. (not that i have anything against their bitchiness, i actually love (some of) them for it. and my guy friends! my gahd they've grown! and i hear some of them have gfs na rin! they have gone far from what they were like in high school.. anyway, i better stop.. ill miss them even more..
  
• embarrassment-i dont think its right for me to say this but the "IN" thing here( in the place where i study and basically live) is MULTIPLY. although im pretty sure everyone here also has a friendster account. anyway see, we have this computer lab where everyone can use the pc's for encoding and internet surfing. its most useful for us scholars but u can also find the "sosyal" pipol here for emergency requirements and the like. but my main point is, as i go thru all of my friend's friendster accounts, its really quite embarrassing coz everyone else can see it too.. (its not lyk in internet cafes here kasi na may cubicle for privacy). knowing that friendster stuff is kinda lyk the thing of the past.. but don't mistake me! i was ashamed of viewing friendster accounts but i was not embarrassed of my friends. plus! it was even more embarrassing when  i saw some pictures of pipol (who are quite famous here too) in some of the accounts i viewed.
  
• hope/dream/whatever- so, di ba i went thru all my friend's accounts.. some of them, my female friends, already had their debuts while some of them are planning theirs.. my debut is coming in 9 months.. that's near enough for me. i was shrugging the thought of having a formal party for it out of my mind but since the thing is up and coming (in 9 months) i cant stop but think of the possibilities. i want to have a party. but haha! wala miy kwarta para ana! my gulay! im the youngest of 5 children and on top of that! im the only girl.. its about time i feel special like you know, a princess.. in the 17-year run of my life i never really had a moment that i felt like a princess! haha! OKAY! im dreaming too much..

so basically, un lang..